Never Touch a Noisy Cow!

Never Touch a Noisy Cow! — the cow doesn't moo, and that's the joke

Something odd has happened down on the farm. Press the squishy silicone touches and every animal makes the wrong noise — the cow certainly isn't mooing. Read the rhymes to find out why the farmyard friends don't sound like themselves.

The mix-up is the book. Toddlers spot it instantly, and being the one who knows the cow has got it wrong is precisely what makes them press every single touch again.

🐄 A joke small children are in on

Knowing what a cow says is one of the first things a toddler is certain about. This book lets them be right about it, out loud, repeatedly — and in the process they end up naming every animal and every proper noise without anyone asking them to.

✋ Squishy touches that do something

• Textured silicone touches on every page
• Each one plays an animal noise when pressed
• Bumpy, squidgy surfaces to explore before the noises even start
• Funny rhyming text that little ones learn by heart
• Sturdy board pages built for enthusiastic prodding
• Battery included and fitted — noisy from the moment it's unwrapped
• Screw-secured battery compartment, and the battery can be replaced when it eventually runs down

📏 Book details

• Format: board book with silicone touches and sound
• Pages: 10
• Size: 233 x 193 x 25mm
• Suitable from: birth+
• Battery: included and fitted, user-replaceable, in a screw-secured compartment
• Written by: Elena Rodgers
• Illustrated by: Stuart Lynch
• ISBN: 9781836422013
• Features: noisy textured silicone touches throughout

❓ Frequently asked questions

Why doesn't the cow moo?
Because that's the joke. The farmyard animals deliberately make each other's noises, and working out who should really be saying what is the whole game. If you'd rather each animal made its own correct sound, this isn't that book — and happily, we have others that are.

Does it need batteries?
No — the battery is included and already fitted, so it works straight out of the box. No hunting through the kitchen drawer on Christmas morning.

Is the battery compartment secure?
Yes. It's closed with a screw, so it needs a screwdriver to open — not small fingers. You'll need that screwdriver yourself when it's time for a new battery, which is rather the point.

Can the battery be replaced?
It can. When the noises eventually give out, the book carries on rather than going in the bin.

What age is it for?
From birth. Babies enjoy the textures and the noises; the mixed-up joke lands from around eighteen months, once they're sure what a cow is supposed to say.

Is it loud?
It's a noisy book and makes no apology for it. Excellent in a playroom, worth thinking twice about on a quiet train.

Are the touches safe to chew?
They're silicone panels set into board pages, made for hands and mouths at this age — though as with any book, it's one for supervised exploring.

Does it make a good gift?
It does. Farm animals are familiar territory for almost every toddler, and the noisy books tend to get unwrapped first.

📚 More Never Touch books

This is the noisy farmyard one. The range splits fairly neatly, so it's worth knowing what else is in it:

• Never Touch a Noisy Monkey! — the same mixed-up joke, set in the jungle.
• Never Touch the Farmyard Friends — the quiet farmyard one, counting down from five. Worth a look if you'd rather not have the noises.
• Never Touch a Dinosaur! — the original, silent, with a different texture on every page.

See the whole range in our Never Touch books collection.

❤️ From our family to yours

Carefully chosen products for babies, toddlers and parents. Browse more baby books and the rest of the Make Believe Ideas range — free UK delivery on orders over £25.